Running Scared

Most people are scarred of spiders, death, Ebola and cancer. I've never been one to go with the crowd. That's just not who I am. When I think fear I think losing people. Not in the death sort of way but in the friendship way. Losing a friend is like losing your right arm. When you had it you knew it was always there for you. You could depend on it, most of all you knew you always had it. Then one day there's an accident. And its gone. Nothings the same. You learn to live without it but everything's changed. But that's the hardest part. Change. Maybe that's because I'm Dutch, and us Dutch don't like change. 

Or maybe its from my dad, who despises change. 

The hardest part about change is accepting it.

A while ago I broke up with a boy from this school. He had been my best friend, we'd gone through it all. Then he changed, he wasn't the boy I knew I could depend on. He got mean. I went to him and I told him it wouldn't work out. I was fine with it and he seemed to be too. It was hard for a whole because he was my bud, I told him everything. After a week or so that's when the evil broke out. He started saying things, twisting my words, lying. Now mind you I can take a lot of crap but some of the stuff did hit home. I talked to him about but he denied it all. Eventually it was all forgotten. But not all was forgiven. How someone treats you at the end of a relationship is far more telling about their character than how they treated you during one. That was hard to accept but looking back, it was the right thing to do.

Losing the right people and the wrong people are two different stories. Both which have and ending but different outcomes. Its our duties as Christians to see Gods work in each story. Yes, sometimes its hard, its a long process but I promise you this; when one door closes another opens.